I may lose a few followers about this, but I feel this bares being said. I have been experiencing this for awhile, and I see it happening to other artists/writers on this site, and it’s not okay.
STOP EMOTIONALLY BLACKMAILING AND EMOTIONAL HOSTAGE TAKING!
– Self-deprecation is not a way to start nor continue a conversation.
– Don’t ask how someone is doing, for the sole purpose of finding an opening to air your tortured mythos when they ask how you’re doing. That’s manipulative.
– Don’t pop into a strangers inbox on anon, just to tell them you’re suicidal. That’s manipulative. Call the suicide hotlines: (for trans: 1-877-565-8860)(other:
1-800-273-8255)
– If you admire someone’s work, whether writing or art, but feel you can’t reach that mark, that’s okay. It’s not okay to message them just to continually insist you’re a “no-talent shitlord” or something. There’s only so much encouragement we can give before it becomes almost soul-sucking to attempt to engage.
– It’s okay to reach out for help, and this post isn’t meant to shame anyone for doing so. This is specifically for the people who find their only drive to engage with someone has to revolve around that person constantly telling them they have self worth and begging them not to harm and pleading with them to see that they’re worth something. If you’re feeling like this to the point that you don’t know how to have a conversation any other way other than to practically beg a complete stranger to give you self-esteem…you may need to seek professional help.
I’m not saying, by any means, not go reach out for help. I’m not meaning to guilt anyone for feeling bad, or feeling bad for long extended periods of time. I am just making this PSA to say, please, don’t do this to strangers who’s jobs aren’t specifically FOR this, and please stop doing things like blowing up people’s asks if they can’t talk to you for five minutes saying all sorts of self-deprecating things.
I don’t want to feel guilted into exhausting myself building up someone’s self worth, because I’m scared they’ll kill themselves if I don’t. I want to help people, because they genuinely need help and are upfront with it, and not trying to manipulate me into sucking praise from me til I just abandon Tumblr for days on end.
This post isn’t about anyone specifically either, I just am seeing this happen to other artists and writers too, and I feel for them. I don’t know if like…there’s a band of people going around doing this or not…but yeah.
HAVING SOMEONE ELSES LIFE FORCED INTO MY HANDS ON ALMOST A NIGHTLY OR AT THE VERY LEAST WEEKLY BASIS IS WHY I ABANDONED SKYPE TWICE! I was so emotionally exhausted at all times because I was constantly made to feel like I was responsible for lifting this person/people up and making sure they didn’t kill themselves. There was no escape from it, I had no choice but to be their “Friend” through everything otherwise their blood would be on my hands…So every night I had to spend 5 or so hours telling this person they’re worth something, going through things I’d told them earlier in the week, just repeating what I knew they wanted to hear just to make sure they didn’t take all the pills they told me they were looking at. Please. If you’re suicidal CALL A HOTLINE OR TEXT A CHAT LINE ABOUT IT! There are people who are qualified to point you in the right direction, to give you real information on how you can get help. You can’t just use your depression as a way to force your “friends” to praise you endlessly because you make them afraid that if you don’t you’ll kill yourself….That is holding someone hostage and I can’t let it happen to me again.
kitthesortingwhatnow 